“I’m stuck in this job,” I said.

Resigned – I did.

We have all probably had situations where we felt unhappy, yet did nothing about it. Whether that be in our relationships, work, families or finances; it may have seemed as though we could do nothing. I have felt as though I have been held captive by this job; as though I didn’t have a choice. Perhaps I didn’t?

It never ceases to amaze me; how small people allow themselves to be and how intricately the human brain can weave a story in which we feel trapped in difficult situations, unable to take the necessary action to free ourselves. It is madness that this mental cage has kept me staring at a screen, with a headset on, in a job which goes against my values and for little apparent gain; I was waiting for something to change, though felt unable to do it.

Reality is often so far removed from our perception, that it is too frightening for many, no, I would say for most; most people stay “safe” behind the bars of their intricate cage, an internal “Stockholm syndrome”.

Imagine that our lives appear written in a special book. About us; it has our lives spread across its pages. As we read new chapters; we experience our story as it unfolds…

My story read thusly; bear with me here…

Henry was becoming frustrated with his role at the company. Most of the colleagues he got on with had left and he was now one of only two salespeople; the other was a good friend and they worked well together. Days past, more people left and his friend started to get depressed; Henry was really sad to see him feeling down and was glad when he decided to see a doctor; who gave him something to help with the black cloud that had appeared over him. A few weeks later; his colleague started to look happier and more healthy; he got a new job left. Henry was glad too, though he was sad to see his friend go.

He blamed the company for his friend going to see the doctor and didn’t want to go to work anymore; pressing snooze on his alarm, until he was going to have to rush; he always felt rushed and watched, because he wasn’t working well. His friends grew tired of hearing about it from him and Henry started to withdraw; too afraid to resign; it might look bad on his CV and he didn’t didn’t feel up to interviewing and he didn’t know what he wanted…

By January, Henry had lost 12 kg and had stopped eating properly, he wasn’t going to the gym and the stress was making his hair start to fall out at the sides.

When we become trapped on the page, we lose our ability to choose our futures; we are embroiled in our story and slave to its telling; always a step behind.

If you were able to immerse yourself in my story, it may have triggered thoughts and emotions which had an impact on you. Either way, you couldn’t do anything about it!

When we read our own stories; we become merely a spectator to ourselves, cheering them on like a favourite sports team; with them in every tackle, point, setback, and victory. There is a sense of unease which comes when watching. No matter how loud we cheer, boo or berate the referee, we are powerless to do anything and our cries will have little effect on the performance of our champion; we are not in control.

Now take that concept and apply it to a time in your life where you felt trapped; where you felt unable to change something and watched with a sense of unease as your life unfolded. Memorable times where you were thinking and working out what was happening, frustrated that things were not going as you wanted; you knew what you wanted to happen and probably how to do it too; “Leave him” “Don’t buy that you can’t afford it” “Resign” “Give them more attention” “Start a business” “Go on holiday, you need a break” “Go to the gym” “Eat less”. Yet you couldn’t do anything to save you from the impending doom or particular path you were traveling away from; where your heart truly lay. You were most likely in the stands, reading your own story and watching your champion; powerless to do anything about events unfolding before you.

How did I resign? – I was holding the pen. So I started writing.